


keep it lowkey

by moondustis



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Idols, Sexual Inexperience, Trainee
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2020-07-02
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:22:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25033909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moondustis/pseuds/moondustis
Summary: A moment shared between two people that could use some more time.
Relationships: Suh Youngho | Johnny/Reader
Comments: 1
Kudos: 41





	keep it lowkey

You remember a time, when you had just started training, that sneaking past managers to go to a internet cafe made you break into a cold sweat. It didn’t take you that long to realize, though, that they didn’t really care about where trainees go if they return in one piece and ready for a full day of practice when morning came.

The manager in charge of your dormitory merely sneaks a glance when you pass through her room, bag in your arm and a mask being adjusted into your face. “Don’t come back too late.” She says absently. “And don’t eat anything that’ll make you bloated.”

You roll your eyes, but still humming in agreement as you finally leave the dorm. Free for a couple hours, is what you think and a sigh escapes your covered lips.

The black car parked just a little far from the dorm, to avoid suspicions, awaits for you and with giddiness on your steps, you make your way to it. Your heartbeat quickens by the second because it’s the first time you’re doing something like this, sneaking out to see someone, and it sends a thrill through your whole body.

You had met Johnny in 2010, when you were still naive enough to think joining a big entertainment company was a good idea. He had been there a little longer than you, probably with plans to debut sooner than it would really happen, and it didn’t take you too long to realize how popular he was with the female trainees. Whenever a party happened and you were able to interact with one another for more than a couple hours, the girls you trained with wouldn’t shut up about how handsome and tall he was. It even came as far as him being nominated and winning a silly competition that crowded the most beautiful trainees. And just maybe you weren’t safe from his charms either.

Your relationship with him, if one could even call it that, took a while to bloom. Shared glances that became stupid jokes, a friendship that turned into something else. Something else being whatever you could do when most of the times you felt like you were being watched and the other half of the time Johnny was far away in another country. It was quick kisses shared inside a small cupboard and late nights conversations on kakaotalk that were just shy of becoming something more than friendly, but stayed like that.

After his debut it was even harder to let things go further, because how does one let go when they are in fact being watched all the damn time? The kisses became quicker and rarer, the texts sparser, and you go weeks without even hearing of him on somewhere else than the news, while you train for a debut that was promised to happen a long time ago.

Right now though, all of that is pushed to the back of your head because when you open the car’s door, he’s right there, smiling at you through a mask of his own. You get into the car in a rush, the click of the seatbelt sounding as he takes off, greeting you and asking how you had been.

“Are you hungry?” He asks, removing the mask now that he deems it not necessary anymore and you do the same. His face these days is something familiar, yet feels completely out of reach from seeing it on the tv so many times. “I know they got you doing those crazy diets.”

You chuckle, shaking your head even though he can’t really see from having his eyes on the road. The words of your manager echoes in your head. “Not really, I had dinner already.”

“Does sweet potatoes really count as dinner?” He asks and you laugh.

“I’ll let you know they let us have rice too now.” You joke back at him, earning a laugh that now that you hear it in person, you realize you have missed very much.

“Good, good.” He hums. “Still, I’ll buy you something delicious on the way back.”

You agree with a little cheer, accepting his hand when he puts his to rest on your thigh. This is something couples do, your foolish mind provides, making the butterflies in your chest go a little crazy and you urge them to stop. “Are you going to take me to the Han River?” Your teasing voice makes him laugh again.

“Sure, we need to do this dispatch scandal right, don’t we?” He rhetorically asks, squeezing your hand and it’s funny at the same time it sets your stomach lurching at the mere idea of being found out. Still, you try not to think about that. “But really, I’m taking you somewhere better.”

And by better he meant more private, because he drives you to a place that looks a lot like your first guess, but that you had never heard about. It looks vacant and when he parks near a cliff you can see the whole city shining down from where you stand. “This is really nice.” You turn to look at him when he unbuckles his seatbelt, leading you to do the same. “How did you find out about it?”

“Sehun told me about it. Said it was a good date spot.” He grins at you, making you wonder if he had told about this to his friends and that’s why they were so gladly giving him tips. Or that he was doing these things with someone else. You pretend that the last thought didn’t cross your mind.

“A date spot?” You gasp in fake surprise. “What kind of scandalous things you have in mind for today, Johnny Seo?”

His laugh is contagious, your own face breaking into a grin when he comes forward as much as the car’s middle will allow. “None at all.” He lies through his teeth, because his hands are sliding to rest at your neck as he brings you closer, to finally, finally, press a kiss to your lips.

It’s a gentle kiss, the traces of both your smiles still there but it soon dies with the deepening of it. Call it distance making the heart grow fonder, call it two people that were usually forbidden this finally getting it, call it whatever. Johnny molds his lips to yours with an ease that makes your body bubble with the begging of arousal, sucking on your lips until you part them enough to let his tongue in.

Now this, the way his tongue slides against yours and how sucks in a way that makes you tingle and a small moan bubble in your throat, is not new but it’s not yet familiar. There was never enough time to do anything but quick kisses back then, but now you feel like you have all the time in the world. So you follow his movements, bringing him closer by the thin fabric of his t-shirt, letting your tongue move in what you hope doesn’t comes across as naive inexperience.

Because Johnny knows it, knows the only person you had ever kissed was him, so he guides you, makes you whimper when he bites just slightly on your bottom lip. Presses small kisses until you’re chasing for more and then moves down to your jaw, to your neck, sucking just lightly, careful to not leave any marks but enough to make you want more.

What is new is the way one of his hands move down on your body, leaving small sparks wherever he touches, until he finally stops it at your thigh, squeezing it while kissing you deeply again. What is new is the way his fingers trace patterns on it until he’s dipping them inside your skirt, tentatively touching the hem of your underwear in a silent plea.

And you, well, you’re nowhere near being in a state that would justify denying him so you express your enthusiasm to it by kissing him harder, moving as if to guide him. He does it so gladly. There are no words needed between two people that have waiting too long for this.

Breaking the kiss, his eyes continue glued to yours as he brings two of his fingers to his lips and licks them until they’re shining with a coat of wetness. You watch the whole thing mesmerized, shaking just a bit in anticipation and anxiety.

The moment his fingers come in contact (finally!) with where you wanted them the most, you let out a gasp and he pushes it by kissing you again. It’s similar to how you touch yourself when you can get some privacy to do so, but at the same time it feels completely different. Overwhelming in some sense because someone else… No, not someone. Johnny, because Johnny is touching you like this.

He moves his fingers, circling your clit in motions that make your end approach too fast, like he knew somehow exactly how to do it. Your eyes fall shut, slightly squeezing as your try to calm yourself down but it’s a difficult task when he presses with a little more force and a wave of arousal crashes on your body.

You grip at his shirt, moaning quietly with a hint of shyness to your noises and he uses that moment to shift his fingers, his thumb now pressing down on your clit and his middle finger dipping slowly inside your entrance as you cry out in surprise and enjoyment.

It’s a weird angle, one that makes it somehow even more of a tight fit than it already was. You know he feels it by the curse that falls from his lips and the way his head drops to your shoulder. He pumps his finger in and out tentatively and you whimper, too far gone now to think about how you’re doing this in a car in the middle of nowhere. To think that the first time the man that you absolutely adore, or any man on that matter, touched you had to be like this. Not that you were complaining, really, but the car was too cramped, restrictive and even with the A/C on you still felt a little too hot with sweat forming on your hairline.

“O-Oh my god.” You wail when Johnny curls his fingers in a way that makes you see stars because he hits that exact spot that you had learned about some time ago.

He groans in return when you clench around him. “Shit, I… I wish I could fuck you.” He confesses and your mind spins with the heaviness of his words.

Still, you feel bold enough to ask. “W-Why don’t you?”

That makes him let out a strangled laugh, finger pushing deeper inside of you. “Come on, don’t say things like that.” He begs and you can’t help but to let out a broken chuckle. “You deserve better than having your first time on a car. And I didn’t bring a condom with me.”

You barely manage to roll your eyes at him, conflicted by the jokingly sweetness of his statement. “Maybe you should have had.” Is all you say and it makes him move his fingers fast, moans the only thing leaving your lips now.

“I’ll fuck you next time, I promise. Somewhere nice.” In the back of your head you think about how this sounds like an empty promise. Neither of you knew when the next time would be, because with his tour soon arriving, you would probably only get to see each other months from now. And how would you even manage to find somewhere nice, when right now, in this car in the middle of nowhere, is the only place you can do this freely.

A lump forms in your throat, tears ready to fall but instead you cry out for different reasons with how quick his movements get. Your orgasm is a good one, not blinding because of your head being somewhere else, but your body still shakes and you still let his name fall out from your lips as your eyes flutter.

When you calm down enough, you both move in a lazy rush to get his pants down enough so his hardness stands out flushed and with the tip an angry red. It’s the first time you’re seeing one in real life and as much as it is intimidating, it makes something spark inside of you. He tells you to lick your palm, which you do, and then he guides your hand up and down, squeezing and moving just as he likes.

You watch mesmerized as he bites his lips, makes some rare but beautiful noises and leans his head on the car seat. When he comes is with a long sigh, hand squeezing against yours as he twitches and liquid spurts of his orgasm coats both of your hands, yours small and manicured underneath his big manly one.

It’s a while until you both calm down enough to clean yourselves with the baby wipes he kept on the car’s compartment. After that, he kisses you again, asking when you had to be back and pouting when you see that is already a little past midnight and inform him you don’t have any time left.

The car ride back to your dorm is spent mostly in silence and empty conversations that are used to avoid saying things that are better left unsaid for now. He insists in buying you a kimbap that you put inside your bag with a promise to have it tomorrow for breakfast.

He parks just a few meters ahead the entrance of your dorm when it’s already 30 minutes past midnight, car coming to a stop and you don’t know how much longer you can keep the tears in. It all feels too much, with him looking at you with sad eyes, the feeling of him still warm in your hand and your own arousal making a mess of your ruined panties.

“I’ll see you soon.” His voice sounds broken when he makes the false promise.

You look back at him then, eyes watering. “Okay.” There’s a lot more that you want to say, that would probably be meaningless because words would never be enough to change the reality. Tomorrow, he’ll go back to his idol life to be NCT’s Johnny and you’ll be back to the training room to prepare to be whoever they have planned for you.

So you only say that, basking in the last moments where you can just be two stupid kids kissing inside an empty cupboard, with not that many cares in the world.

When he kisses you one last time, you let it be enough. It has to be enough. For now, at least.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for reading! i would love to know what you guys think about it!
> 
> if you'd like, you can support me on ko-fi.com/moondustis   
> i'm also on tumblr @ moondustis.tumblr.com and on patreon @ patreon.com/moondustis


End file.
